Debate of the pastors

[draggonlaady]

So it seems that all of the grand political contenders in the current race are plagued with inconvenient religious leaders.

We've all heard about Obama's racist pastor problems, and McCain's issues with the "Katrina is God's punishment for gays" pastor endorsement.

And now Pastor Ed Kalnin, the senior pastor of Palin's former Pentecostal church, has also come under fire for his comments. In 2004, he told church members if they voted for John Kerry for president, they wouldn't get into heaven. He told them, "I question your salvation."

Yep, that's right, God says vote Republican or burn.

So, who's got the word on what church Biden goes to? Let's keep this balanced, folks.


And just to add to the fun, here's the lyrics of a song I absolutely love. Voltaire's

God thinks all blacks are obsolete farm equipment

God thinks the Jews killed his son and must be punished

God thinks the white man is Satan

God, they know what God thinks



God thinks we should all convert to Judaism

God thinks we must all be Christians and

God thinks we should all embrace Islam

God thinks the only true religion is Hinduism



And I

I know what God thinks

God thinks you're a waste of flesh

God prefers an Atheist



God thinks all people like you are evil

God thinks all people like you are an embarrassment to creation

self-righteous, judgmental, first to throw the stone

and use His name for your own protection



God thinks the sun revolves around the Earth

God thinks there was something very wrong with Copernicus

God thinks abortion is murder and

God thinks everything that science gave us is wrong

God thinks women deserve it

God thinks AIDS is a form of punishment



I hate people who blame the Devil for their own shortcomings and

I hate people who thank God when things go right



And I

I know what God thinks

God thinks you're an idiot

God prefers a heretic



God God

God thinks all people like you are evil

God thinks all people like you are an embarrassment to creation

self-righteous, judgmental, first to throw the stone

and use His name for your own agenda



God is a liberal

God is a democrat

God wants you to vote Republican

never trust a man who puts his words in the mouth of god

and says that it's absolute truth

it's lies and it smells like death

it's all in a day's work taking money from the poor

Why do you think that God would need your dirty money

if he wanted to start a holy war?



self-righteous, judgmental, first to throw the stone

and use His name for your own protection



God thinks puppies need to die and

God thinks babies need to drown

'cause God is neither good nor bad

God is you and me

God is Everything

Comments

[interactiveleaf.livejournal.com]

Joseph Biden is a Roman Catholic.

We don't want to get in to what *his* pastor says. Or does.

[draggonlaady.livejournal.com]

Excellent! Can we decide the election by letting the pastors duke it out? God decides!

[shakespearemofo.livejournal.com]

We could just nail them all to a cross and see which one God favors.

[interactiveleaf.livejournal.com]

John McCain's and Sarah Palin's pastors won't participate unless there are gays to bash.

Obama's pastor won't participate unless he gets to beat up on whitey.

Joseph Biden's minister is going to be too distracted by the altar boys to get a punch in.

But it wouldn't occur to any one of these so called "Christians" to turn the other cheek.

So I don't know where that leaves the electorate.

[draggonlaady.livejournal.com]

well, McCain's pastor is decidedly old-white-boy, so that give's Obama's pastor a target. I'm sure we could convince McCain's and Palin's that Biden's is gay, by implying the alter-boy thing. And catholics are notoriously good at self-defense and evasion, so I'm sure he'll find some way to pass at least one of them off on Obama's pastor. It'll be a lovely chaotic round-robin, like a demolition derby without the cars. :)

[interactiveleaf.livejournal.com]

Oh that was lovely. Definitely one of the funniest things I have seen today, and I so needed it.

Thank you!

[draggonlaady.livejournal.com]

I do aim to please :)

[chiefseamonkey.livejournal.com]

I'm glad I'm going to Hell for voting for Kerry. It's a huge load off knowing that I don't have to work towards it anymore.

[draggonlaady.livejournal.com]

Heh. You were worried? Look who you associate with--I'm almost certain to be held against you at the judgment.

[shakespearemofo.livejournal.com]

Biden is either Atheist, or a Satanist.

Nah... Wiki says/implies he may be Christian. Still, he may have a crazy pastor.

[winnett.livejournal.com]

Yep, that's right, God says vote Republican or burn.

Good thing I don't believe in their God! Wew.

[draggonlaady.livejournal.com]

Well then you can't join in the demolition derby :P

[brainweevil.livejournal.com]

You've got a Methodist coloring book
And you color really well
But don't color outside the lines
Or God will send you to hell
'Cause God hates war
And God hates crime
But He really hates people
Who color outside the lines

[draggonlaady.livejournal.com]

What's that from?

[brainweevil.livejournal.com]

The Dead Milkmen