draggonlaady

http://www.salon.com/politics/war_room/2009/08/27/circumcision/

Apparently, there is no conflict here AT ALL between thinking Obama can't be American if he's uncircumcised, and screaming that because a review of several studies by the CDC shows potential benefit for infants who've been circumcised, Mr President will personally push through a law forcing doctors to circumcise all boy-children everywhere.

*headdesk*

Thanks endotoxin, for pointing up the crazy to me.

So there's this bloke, you see, who's running for Mayor of Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. He wants to be in charge, you see, because he believes he should be. No, nix that. He believes he already is, that he is above and immune to the laws that bind the rest of us puny "14th Amendment" citizens.

http://www.inlander.com/print/163304
http://www.postfallspress.com/articles/2009/07/09/news/news04.txt
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fourteenth_Amendment_to_the_United_States_Constitution#Text

And the winner is . . . the man with the martini
BY DAVE BARRY
Stolen shamelessly from MiamiHerald.com.

In analyzing the results of Tuesday's historic election, the question we must ask ourselves, first and foremost, is: what the heck were the results of Tuesday's historic election?

I personally don't know. The Miami Herald made me send in this analysis before the election was actually over, so that it could be printed in a timely manner. This is part of the newspaper industry's crafty plan to defeat this ''Internet'' thing that has the youngsters so excited.

Anyway, my election analysis, based on weeks of reading political bogs, listening to talk radio and watching campaign ads on television, is that one of the following things is true:

• Barack Obama is our next president, which is very bad because he is a naive untested wealth-spreading terrorist-befriending ultraliberal socialist communist who will suddenly reveal his secret Muslim identity by riding to his inauguration on a camel shouting ''Death to Israel!'' (I mean Obama will be shouting this, not the camel) after which he will wreck the economy by sending Joe the Plumber to Guantánamo and taxing away all the income of anybody who makes over $137.50 per year and giving it to bloated government agencies that will deliberately set it on fire.

• Or, John McCain is our next president, which is very bad because he is a 287-year-old out-of-touch multiple-house-owning fascist who will rape the environment and build nuclear power plants inside elementary schools and reinstate slavery and create tax loopholes that benefit only people who own three or more personal helicopters, after which he will declare war on the entire United Nations and then keel over dead and leave us with commander-in-chief Sarah ''Flash Card'' Palin.

• Or, Ralph Nader is our next president, which is very bad because it means there has been a successful Klingon invasion.

• Or, the outcome of the election is being disputed because of irregularities such as unregistered horses voting in Ohio, or some Florida county tabulating votes in Roman numerals, or God knows what else, which is very bad because it means the next president will be selected via a giant Lawyer-Palooza court fight that will go on until it's time to hold the Iowa caucuses for the NEXT presidential election.

So basically my analysis is that, whatever happened, we are, as a nation, doomed. We are also bitterly divided, because whoever wins, roughly half of us will despise the other half, and vice versa.

You know what I miss? I miss 1960. Not the part about my face turning overnight into the world's most productive zit farm. What I miss is the way the grown-ups acted about the Kennedy-Nixon race. Like the McCain-Obama race, that was a big historic deal that aroused strong feelings in the voters. This included my parents and their friends, who were fairly evenly divided, and very passionate. They'd have these major honking arguments at their cocktail parties. But unlike today, when people wear out their upper lips sneering at those who disagree with them, the 1960s grown-ups of my memory, whoever they voted for, continued to respect each other and remain good friends.

What was their secret? Gin. On any given Saturday night they consumed enough martinis to fuel an assault helicopter. But also they were capable of understanding a concept that we seem to have lost, which is that people who disagree with you politically are not necessarily evil or stupid. My parents and their friends took it for granted that most people were fundamentally decent and wanted the best for the country. So they argued by sincerely (if loudly) trying to persuade each other. They did not argue by calling each other names, which is pointless and childish, and which constitutes I would estimate 97 percent of what passes for political debate today.

What I'm saying is: we, as a nation, need to drink more martinis.

No, you know what I'm saying. I'm saying, now that this election is over, whatever the hell happened, can we please grow up and stop being so nasty to each other? Please?

OK, I didn't think so.

Please pass the pitcher.

P.S. The CNN hologram is the single stupidest thing I have ever seen on TV, and I am including Carrot Top in that statement.

http://somehedgehog.livejournal.com/245807.html

Got a sense of humor? Ever play D&D? Go read.

As ganked from ursulav

As evidenced by Katie Couric, Sarah Palin is unable to name any Supreme Court Case other than Roe v. Wade.

The Rules: Post info about ONE Supreme Court decision, modern or historical, on your lj. (Any decision, as long as it’s not Roe v. Wade.)

So. Kennedy v Louisiana.

In a 5 to 4 decision, with the more liberal members forming the majority, the court struck down a 1995 Louisiana law that allowed the death penalty to be used against anyone who rapes a child under the age of 12. The decision overturned the death penalty for Patrick Kennedy, a 43-year-old who was convicted of raping his 8-year-old stepdaughter in 1998.

Quote from the Washington Post

Now, I am about the most oblivious person functioning when it comes to politics and most news. But I knew this case was floating around. I should think that a case this prominent and recent (with both McCain and Obama having made statements of opinion about it) is something that a vice-presidential candidate really should know exists.

gets you disqualified if you're a sprinter. Apparently, it just makes your 'people' look silly if you're a politician.

http://voices.washingtonpost.com/thefix/2008/09/mccain_wins_debate.html?nav=rss_blog

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/politics/images/26Sep_Friday_WSJ.JPG

Article about, and screen shot showing, an advert that was posted on the Wall Street Journal Online this morning, not only before the debates, but before McCain had even announced his mind-change and intention to attend the debate.

So it seems that all of the grand political contenders in the current race are plagued with inconvenient religious leaders.

We've all heard about Obama's racist pastor problems, and McCain's issues with the "Katrina is God's punishment for gays" pastor endorsement.

And now Pastor Ed Kalnin, the senior pastor of Palin's former Pentecostal church, has also come under fire for his comments. In 2004, he told church members if they voted for John Kerry for president, they wouldn't get into heaven. He told them, "I question your salvation."

Yep, that's right, God says vote Republican or burn.

So, who's got the word on what church Biden goes to? Let's keep this balanced, folks.


And just to add to the fun, here's the lyrics of a song I absolutely love. Voltaire's ( God Thinks )

Feel free to discuss this here, but I did not write it. All credit (also author feedback) should go to ursulav. Go see her beautiful artwork at metalandmagic.com.

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(Please note, I am pissy this morning and have PMS and haven't gotten laid all week, and these things are making me GRUMPY so this is not as careful and politic a rant as I usually try for. Sorry.)

Swear to god, if I hear one more thing about how the media is being unfair to Palin...

You know what, guys? It. Doesn't. Matter. The right's been claiming there's a liberal media for...longer than I've been alive, actually. You'd think they'd have adapted by now. But no, every time the media starts asking questions about somebody, they start screaming about the liberal media again, as if this is a new and shocking development.

Did you really, honestly think that a woman and a complete unknown would be introduced and the press would NOT start acting like a pack of sharks on Free Chum Day?

Sheesh, if you can't pull up your big-boy (and big-girl) pants and deal with the PRESS, I'm not exactly sanguine about your dealing with, y'know, stuff that actually MATTERS. Terrorism is unfair. Global warming is unfair. Hurricanes are unfair. Economic downturn is unfair. The world will be brutal and unkind to you, and you don't get to stomp your feet and say "The world is being unfair!"

Well, actually you can. We call that "whining."

Whining is not a coping strategy, people. A frequently hostile press is part of what you deal with as president. All this sniveling about how unfair they're being is WHINING. It was whining back when Clinton did it over Monica, it was whining when Hillary did it--and she did a little of it, I'm willing to admit, and yes, the press was cruel and unfair to her at points*--and it's whining when McCain/Palin does it.

Yes, the press is often unfair. They're sensationalistic, and yes, we all know they're often liberal. And they love a feeding frenzy like nobody's business, and they will dig up every scrap of dirt known to humankind, because that is their nature.

Suck it up. Did you think they would love you? Do you think that ANY reporter, finding a chink that could bring down ANY candidate, wouldn't leap on that with both feet, whooping like a common loon with a throat condition?

If this comes as a surprise, you're idiots.
If this catches you flat-footed, you're inept.

Shut. Up. And. Deal.

You've had YEARS to figure this out. If you don't have a better coping strategy by now than crying about it, why should I believe you'll get a coping strategy for anything?

There are ways to deal with the press, but public whining is the least and lamest of them. Can y'all kindly get off your asses and get a better strategy that doesn't involve all this snivelling?

Mind you, I think we've gotten way too verbally pansy in our politics, and I sometimes long for the days when we could scream obscenities at each other across the parlimentary floor, because it bred for politicians that could think on their feet instead of cowering in the arms of the speechwriters.

It's pissing me off this morning.

And I think I want chocolate.



*Arguably it was her supporters that did not neccessarily handle it well, a lot of 'em--the damn campaign has been going on so long, I've half forgotten if the Clinton camp did anything but ignore the more stumbling sexism as anything but beneath contempt--but that's water under the bridge. Still, there WAS whining, and let me assure y'all that I found it just as annoying coming from my side as I do from the Republicans.

Links pointed out by interactiveleaf.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/CRIME/08/27/obese.prosecution.ap/index.html?eref=rss_topstories

http://www.dailynews.com/ci_10301518?source=rss_viewed