draggonlaady

Slept in this morning, and that was really pleasant. Happy to report that we did not wake up covered in bedbug bites. Headed back downtown for lunch at Tomato Head. winnett, if you are ever in Knoxville, find this place. You'll love it. Lots of vegan choices on the menu. Pepperoni rolls were fun but not spectacular, the tomato sauce to dip them in could maybe have used simmering a little longer. The cheese melt sandwich Bruce had was really quite good, and the cheeses were really nice quality all around.

Then we wandered about town randomly, hit a bunch of little stores. Found dessert at Rita's; the frozen custard was really yummy but I was a bit disappointed by the mango ice--it tasted more like orange, very citrusy.

Yee Haw Printers was amazing to wander through. They have banks and banks and drawers of lead printer strikes, carved wooden print presses, some just beautiful stuff. I didn't realize people still did old letterpress printing any more, I guess.

Dinner at Calhoun's for BBQ ribs and pecan pie. Really cheerful, friendly staff, and balcony seating out by the Tennessee river was pleasant. Good place all around, I think.

After dinner we decided on some lechery, and headed out to The Emerald Club for some dancing girls. It was fun, but the variety was all in the girl and not in the dancing. Seemed like they all did very similar routines, and several of them didn't really put much effort into it. Which, you know, Thursday night and only about 10 customers (we were seriously outnumbered by dancers!) I guess they were probably pretty bored. The one lady that really stood out was actually the heaviest of the dancers, but she looked like she was having fun with it, you know? Talked to her a bit after, and she had just started at this place yesterday, after a 4 year hiatus since she danced in Florida. Sweet smile that lady had!

And now, back in the hotel for some sleepings. We'll be flying home tomorrow, wish us better luck than we had on the trip out here!

You can fly from one end of the country to the other for a moderate fee and little effort.

Or so I hear.
What actually happened is that we had repeated problems, hassles, took forever, and both of us had massive headaches by the time we got here last night.
We had a schedule for a single layover in Denver, switching to a plane from the same company. We were to leave for Denver at 6 am, arrive at 9:30, catch the plane out of Denver at 10:15, get to Tennessee at 1:30 pm (local time, there's some time zones in there). Easy-peasy!

Except that the first flight was 20 minutes late leaving, because they had to feed it new hydraulic fluid, and the tech/engineer/whoever couldn't come out right away. Inconvenient, but we still should have 15 minutes to get to the next plane, and since they're same airline it's all in the same area. Doable. Until we arrive in Denver and spend half an hour sitting in the plane on the runway because there is apparently no gate open at which to unload. We don't get off the plane until the next flight has already flown. I rather wonder if we didn't take their gate after they left.

We are rescheduled... not to take the same path later, but instead to Chicago, and from there to Knoxville. First leg of this is another United, same gate we were supposed to be leaving from before. Enough time to grab a piece of pizza from Dominoes and eat it on the plane, but not enough time for anything else. Mild headaches for the both of us at this point, but the ibuprofen is in the checked bag. And we can't sit together, we're 6 rows apart, both in center seats.

Then we have a three hour layover in Chicago. Three hours is a long time to sit in an airport, but not quite long enough to bother leaving and going back through security. It is also not quite long enough to be worth friends from Urbana driving the 2 1/2 hours up to hang out in the airport with us on no notice. So we went hunting for lunch. Headaches still with us, drugs still checked.

We found The Great American Bagel. They are not the greatest, sorry. The cream of chicken with wild rice soup was ricy, which is good, but flavored primarily with salt. I rather believe that soup should not make you thirsty. Bruce had a bagel sandwich, said it was alright, but shouldn't bagels be chewy? We went to Brioche Doree and got a "brute chocolate muffin" for dessert. Asked what made it a brute, the guy behind the counter looked confused. I think the proper answer (which he could not, of course, have said) was that you have to be a brute to be strong enough to bite through the crust on the thing. We threw more than half of it away. Ya'll know me, I don't discard chocolate. For that matter, I threw half of the soup away, and I'm not all that keen on discarding food in general.

We rented a movie (Coraline) and watched most of it on the laptop while waiting for the next flight. This one was a United Express, so still sort of United and the luggage should be under control, but it was about 3 miles away from the gate we unloaded at. The one modern marvel that I really appreciated yesterday was the slide walks. Also, women in high heeled boots with tight pants, but I don't know if that counts. Whoever thought the flashing tube neon above the slide walks in the tunnel at O'hare was a good idea though? My headache did NOT agree with them, thankyouverymuchsir.

Then we get on the final plane. It's wee. No gate ramp, walk out on the runway and climb the stairs. It also loaded early, oddly, and we two were among the last three on. Didn't fret long about making folks wait though, because as the pilot started all the pre-flight run-up, the power went OUT. Total darkness. No exit lights, nothing. Stays dark just long enough for someone in the back of the plane to start giggling nervously. You know that giggle...high pitched with just an edge of OHGODWHATAREWEGOINGTODO!?!? in it? Then the lights come back on. Captain says on the overhead that we all have to get back off the plane now, but we can leave our stuff. So we do. Tramp all the way back up to the gate, and sit there for 20 minutes. Announcement comes out, you can re-load, we just need your boarding passes again. At which about 10 people holler almost in unison "You said to leave everything on the plane!" Attendant says "Bring your ID to the service podium, we'll print you new ones." Which satisfied most, but at least 1 woman is standing there saying, "no, no, I left EVERYTHING on the plane, including my wallet, because you said to leave everything on the plane!" Well, they printed her a boarding pass anyway, but still, what the Hell people? So we get back on the plane. And the pilot goes through the run-up again. Uneventfully this time. Explains that for some reason the plane's computer wasn't talking to the airport's and "couldn't figure out what city we are in." But everything's okay now. Oh, so comforting. Here's hoping we don't have a sudden total power-down in the air, yes?

And we get our third round of instructions in one day on how to fasten your seat belt. Really...do they honestly think people that can figure out all the hoops and regs of buying a ticket, checking in, getting through security, locating the gate, etc, and that have the technological acceptance to trust themselves to some giant metal tube hurtling through the sky, cannot figure out a seat belt?

Anyway. The plane did not power down mid-flight (as evidenced by my writing this in a hotel room, not a hospital room or Hell). We arrived, finally, at 10 pm. Raging headaches, neck stiff and sore and spreading into my shoulders from trying to sleep in the plane seat, and from dragging around my shoulder bag. Happily, baggage arrived intact and we pulled our checked bag off the carousel about 5 minutes after we hiked down to it. Drugs were taken.

A taxi was hailed. We loaded in. And then noticed the sign that says he doesn't take Visa. We unloaded. A second taxi was hailed. This one takes Visa. We re-loaded and headed to the hotel.

Yesterday was, quite simply, the worst flight experience of my life. Thank all the gods of mercy and gravity that the problems were all on the ground.